Choosing Marriage: we>me 5/5

I don't remember when I first discovered Debra Fileta, but she is my soul sister. Debra is a self-proclaimed realist, which is why I like her approach so much. She is the author of the site, True Love Dates. She does not beat around the bush with her relationship advice.

I signed up to be on the book's Launch team, but I was quickly reminded I should not plan to do anything at the end of the school year - oops - my bad! So sorry, Debra. Better late than never, right?!

I am a slow reader, but I wanted to make sure I was taking the time to gain the wisdom and knowledge Debra was sharing with singles and couples alike about relationships. Each chapter ended with reflection questions for singles and couples.

Now to get to why you all should grab a copy from Amazon or your local bookstore - it is AWESOME. Worth it. I like to read relationship books because I am far from perfect and like to hear what others have to say on the subject.

"A good marriage comes from a series of decisions over an extended period of time, with the commitment of two people choosing to love each other no matter what my come their way" (23). I wish people could understand this concept - and I am saying this as a single person. Even though I have seen the good, the bad, and the ugly of marriages around me, it still remains a life goal to be a wife and mother. I believe it is worth it and reading this book has given me hope that it is possible to have a good marriage. I will never truly understand marriage until I am married because "[y]ou can't experience real love with a person until you've experienced the entirety of a person - the good, the bad, the ugly, and the beautiful" (101).

In this book, Debra addresses communication barriers, boundaries, and learning about good sex within marriage. She shares personal stories as well as stories from those she counseled.

Debra is a straight-shooter when she states, "Seek accountability.... Get a tight rein on your thought life! Stop feeding your mind entertainment that will pollute it with lust.... [I]f you don't have a community, it's time to turn off Netflix, get off social media, and start investing in real-life relationships with godly people" (175). Ouch. That applies to singles and couples alike.

Debra's last chapter called "The Beautiful Exchange" could be a book itself, comparing the seasons of a year to seasons in marriage. I guess it is how you view each natural season how you would compare it to marriage, but it's a challenge to think deeper about the ebb and flow of life seasons. 

"Marry someone who will make you better" (184).